Pressmen, chapter 9

Feed the press to feel the press

Wherever there is a free meal, wherever there is a buffet, wherever a lunch is offered, whenever a cocktail meeting takes place, there you will find a pressman. Beside the pressmen's commandments is the principle by which no information feed is possible without feeding the information makers, which means nothing but journalists alone consume a huge quota of world food stock. «Feed the press to feel the press», that's the rule! That's the way. Sometimes the path to pass from feeling the press and feeling depressed is very short, but that's another story. Anyway, whenever press is not fed, the press always find the way for a self-service! It has been proved pressmen are able to eat everything up alone, and this is why the press world will never die of starvation. So, in case of no food moment, every editor is ready to revise the agenda and delete all the press events when their men are not treated as deserved. That's the reason why in every important event free food is given to correspondents, since this is a guarantee that press will attend. At the same time organizers will be sure journalists are not going to write too negative reports just because of lunch. This is not corruption, this is nothing but business. Remember: coverage rhymes with beverage! Thus, if you want friendly media or simply media coverage reports you have to create the right environment offering at least something to drink. At least. After all if diplomacy and decision happen around a table, the same can happen with information. Most of the time those who write negative stories are the journalist who hadn't be invited.

Pressmen, chapter 8

Vanity Press 
(lessons of non-journalism)

Who does a pressman write to? Community, it could be said. Society could be another answer. Sorry, but all these answers are wrong. A pressman writes nothing but to himself. Articles and press reports are the pure written expression of any single journalist composing exclusively for his personal pleasure and self-glorification. Information, opinion, analysis are nothing compared to vanity press. In case you believe «where is the new?« is the question on the basis of pressmen activity, let's make clear once and for all that the press world only answer to the following question: «Magic mirror in my hand, who is the greatest in the land?» Of course the greatest one is always the pressman, not a specific pressman, but every single man holding a valid press card. Reason and truth are not out of there, but in what journalists write. So, even when the final work is incomprehensible or not properly written, it is just because of the reader. Reader is the only responsible for not having got what is on paper. Let's have a practical example, and take an article from a well known Italian news agency:

(Original version) 

 ++ Fonti Ue, c'è ipotesi stop Schengen previsto da art.26 ++

(ANSA) - BRUXELLES, 21 GEN - In caso di "minaccia sistemica e persistente" alle frontiere esterne di Schengen, la Commissione Ue può proporre al Consiglio l'attivazione dell'articolo 26 del codice, che prevede la possibilità di introdurre controlli alle frontiere interne fino a due anni. Così il portavoce della Commissione Ue. A dicembre Bruxelles non aveva escluso la possibilità di farvi ricorso in futuro e secondo fonti Ue la questione si riproporrà al summit di febbraio. A maggio, la Germania - e a seguire altri Paesi - esaurirà il periodo massimo per i controlli consentito dagli articoli 23 e 25.(ANSA).

Pressmen, chapter 7

Truth by truth

Is a journalist an asshole or is there something more behind complaints and fakes? Most of the people think pressmen are motherfuckers because completely unable to describe the truth by truth. Well, sometime it can be the case (I will write about, one day) but other times is not. On the contrary, information is manipulated by non-pressmen. Politicians, lobbyists, NGOs, stakeholders, corporations... Every player has to be sure readers read the truth he wants. Starting from this concept we are full of situations where "stakeholders" try to get media endorsement for free, arriving to exert pressure and to interfere with journalists activity in case pressmen don't sell the new as "stakeholder" want. Let's take the Nativity and suppose that Joseph is Mary's spokesperson. You will forgive if I chose a holy example, but according to the first pressmen commandment «Thou shalt have no other gods before a journalist», so forget for a while to Jesus. I apologise with all those who believe, but I'm pretty sure in the Western societies there will be a lot of people who'll can better understand thanks to this example. So, Joseph is Mary's spokesperson and he sends a SMS to a group of journalist to inform that in the margin of the childbirth she will some meetings. Immediately after one of the journalists uses the SMS to twit the following message: «Mary will meet the Magi in the margin of the childbirth». In one minute time Joseph calls the journalist asking him «Who did you tell Mary is going to meet the Magi?» and pointing out that «you did something it hasn't to be done, because such a tweet can make Mary upset». Given the situation, we have to explain the case as follows:
1) When a spokesperson sends a message, he basically sends an information. In this way he is what in journalism is called "a source". Pressmen use sources in order to produce new, and the fact Mary is going to meet people is indeed a new. Thus, journalists make their job;

Pressmen, chapter 6

Star System

In Hollywood rules the so called "star system". Basically, a person can have the chance to count only if present. If you're not there you don't exist: that's what the star system is about. But there is no need to travel to Hollywood in order to find a star system. Any press card is sufficient to live like in Hollywood. Journalist means star, no way. Any journalist lives to become a super-star. Any journalist wants to be the king of this star system. So pressmen basically are everywhere, because this is the only way they have to be. Of course they simply are, according to the press world commandments. Anyway, put into the star system pressmen have to appear. It doesn't matter how, the only thing that really counts is to appear. There are several methods to live the star system: one of the most popular is giving the impression to be in a place without being. In this case pressmen work comfortably at their own office in their home town, writing as they are somewhere else. For example, when a journalist in Rome has to write about a F1 race which took place in Prague, at the beginning of his article he will write «Prague, 13 March...». Rules and professionals ethics would require the journalist to write the name of the city where he is, but rules and professional ethics are for beginners. Once a man gets a press card he becomes a journalist. And journalists have no ethics and, above all, are gods. Thus, they can modify rules at any times. Using the name of the city for their articles, journalists can show the world to be correspondent, to travel, to be real scoop-hunters. They basically can demonstrate to be there, in full compliance with the star system basic rule: if you're not there you don't exist. Even if it is totally untrue, pressmen are everywhere and in this way they exist.

Pressmen, chapter 5

Pressmen are forever

Pressmen are forever. For common people this could sound as a damn, and in fact it is. Journalists will never say because they could never realize, but once a man become a pressman he is marked for ever. First of all, once the official exam is passed and the man is registered on the professional register, there he'll remain until the dead. Even when the pressman reaches retirement the journalist remain a journalist. It doesn't count whether you work or not: if you are journalist you are a journalist and that's that. That's death, maybe, since any person stops to be a normal human being once on the professional register, but this is another story. Since a pressman remains always a pressman, he will be hired even if in retirement. That's the press, baby, the press. And there's nothing you can do about it. Nothing.
So, let's take a retired pressman with a long career behind him and a younger pressman with less experience. In modern times newspapers prefer the first category, made by people already trained, with higher professional skills, more sources and a better network. As a result, elder pressmen will get a second life of work. Even if retired they will continue to work, getting both the retirement allowance and the salary. Since they already get the retirement allowance, employers will hired again at same condition but lower wage. They are simply more  competitive than younger colleagues, who will be discriminated. Somebody could argue such a practice is unfair. Come on! This is just a demonstration that a pressman is forever.

Pressmen, chapter 4

When journalists meet Italy

«Why don't you write in English»? The question mark is about a media having journalists in Brussels without producing any new in any "conventional" language spoken abroad. Well, when the press world act in Brussels in order to cover the EU institutions, could it be possible acting only on the own proper language? If we are talking about the Italian section of the press world the answer will be affirmative. «Why don't you write in English?» it would just one of the first reactions from the audience when Italy meets journalism. A lot has been said about journalism, and not just a few words have been spent for the magic of the senselessland. But there is no end to intelligence. Of course writing and working in a language different from the own one is not something easy; of course having translators is a cost, sometimes not sustainable for all; of course the main audience for every media is the national one. But despite all that, working in the heart of Europe and not investing in Europe is something difficult to explain to external people.
«You are based in Brussels»
«Yes»
«And you write about the European institutions»
«Yes»
«And you have no an English section??»
«Ehm... No»
«Why?»
Eh. This is the typical conversation you could experience abroad, and "why" is terribly a very good question, since it is not an easy one to deal with. Journalists are not the ones responsible for the policy media, thus "why" is something to be left to directors. But it would be useless.

Senselessland (chapter 8)

Impressions and images from Belpaese

Try to understand what Italy is today is something not easy at all. Disorganization or superficiality could be the right terms to use in order to explain to what Italy correspond. But the key point is maybe another one: Italy is turning from bad to worse with no stop. This is the impression a traveler has once he’s in the country, especially if the traveler is a “commuter”, a person coming quietly often in different moment of the year. Every time there is something incredible, impossible to see in any another civilized country in the world. Or in Europe, if we prefer. Take an office, any office you want, and take staff working there. It will sound weird, maybe ironic, but no one in that office will have any idea about the working plan. Rotation, holiday period, time table… Nobody will can tell you when the office will be open to public. No way: that’s Italy. We are talking about the professional association of the Italian journalists, which is the body responsible for all the issues related to this job. Payment of the annual quota, registration, unemployment benefit, regulation, rights and duties, trade union, legal assistance… This and much more is what the professional order is focused on. Now, journalism foresees people can go working abroad, so it happens some Italians come back just for a short period (Christmas break, for example!), and need to go to their professional order. First of all, practical information are kept on the website: there, on the home page, a short description of the working period appears. Closed from the 24th of December to the 2nd of January. Apparently. Because once called to have some preliminary information by phone, the clerk on the other side states offices are opened the 29th and the 30th of December, something not communicated on the website.

Pressmen, chapter 3

The pressmen commandments

«Thou shalt have no other gods before a journalist», states the first commandment of the press world. And considering there's no world outside the pressman's dimension, between press world and press there's no difference. It has been already written about pressmen, but as far as you can write it, it will never be enough. Or well, as far as you can write it will be always non-sense. The second commandment of the press world comes directly from the first one. «What is written is written. Thou shalt have no other truth before what a journalist wrote». This is the second commandment, and as every commandment it has to be strictly respected. Since pressmen are divinities, recognizing they can write something wrong would mean calling divine infallibility into question. Furthermore, it's not professional think the possibility to be mistaken exists: it would mean press men are not trustworthy. That's the reason why any journalist never follow professional ethics. Of course there are professional ethic rules, but are nothing compared to commandments. Thus don't pretend to see CRTs to be published, please! Oh, sorry. CRTs are Correct Re-Typing, operations foreseen by ethics. Ethics rules oblige any journalist to correct and/or rectify in case of wrong or false information. When articles are wrong, the same has to be re-typed. But, come on! Do you really believe a pressman can be wrong? Please! Even if it happened someone would mislead you have to keep in mind: a) hardly ever readers can distinguish truth from untruth because they are not experts in subject the article talks about, and have thus no competence to identify the mistake; b) most of the time editors-in-chief can't recognize mistakes because they are not experts in subject the article talks about, and have thus no competence to prevent a false information be published; c) by practice when a correction has to be made, a second artificial new article is published in order to update the previous article containing "obsolete" information; d) in any case «what is written is written».

Pressmen, chapter 2

Boys and girls

Distrust journalists. If for mistake, just for a while, you think a person acting journalist can be a good partner, let it go. Man or woman it doesn't make difference: journalists are the farest point from a stable relationship and from family ideas. So, if you are in search of a person to stay with please focus your attention elsewhere. It has been said what a kind of person is a journalist. In chapter one of this never-ending saga a panoramic view has been offered in very reliable manner, but if you don't believe it's up to you. That means soon or late you'll see by yourself. What is essential to keep in mind there's no difference between men and women. In this the press world shows to have well worked in terms of promotion of gender balance. Both men and women are unbearable.
   Boys spend time to strut around like roosters in hen houses. They only talk about their feats, and everybody has to stand out. The only goal is to impose the own supremacy over the others, but no journalists will accept to be recognised as a second-rate reporter. Journalist is second to none by definition, so every single guy fights an eternal battle to try to persuade the rest of the press world he is the best. We can say, using a metaphor, that male journalists main activity is penis size self-measurement. The second one, of course, is going in search of chicks. Since journalists in general only respond to their ego, stay with another person becomes impossible unless the other accept to be the just journalist's ego nourishment source. That's what male journalists search in a woman. it could be said the majority of men (perhaps all of them) have a pure and genuine sex consideration of women. That is true for journalists as well, with the small difference by which having sex with a girl is not only reason for pleasure but also reason for ego increasing. At the end, the only reason why a male journalist looks for girls is to can be proud of when he speaks to his colleagues after having got what he was looking for. Nothing strange: the difference between men and pressmen is press, and it's not question of just a word. Since there's nothing but pressmen and journalism, male reporters will be not able to take care of family. Statistics show the majority of professionals are at least one wedding failure behind their back. And that's also true for people from female gender.

Pressmen, chapter 1

Just three words

According to the basic rule of journalism there are five "W" to answer: who, what, why, where, when. According to practice there are just three words journalists mind: I, me, myself. If you look for some one with an immoderate ego a journalist is a the right person to count on. This world is full of foolish, selfish, prideful, immodest, arrogant, vain, smart ass people, but journalist is always the best, in any case. Compared to the most important thing in world journalists are special: they are the most important thing in the world, making the entire universe meaningless. The press world is infested by a pressmen totally unable to construct sentences in non first person subject. "I was there...", "I did that...", "I believe...", "I know for sure...", "in my opinion...", "It is exactly what happened to me...", "I remember...", "I had an interview with...", "I met...", "I talked to...", "I wrote...", "I went by myself...". For journalists there's no moment in life without using the first person, and the explanation for such a phenomenon is the only possible: pressmen are supermen. That's how they consider themselves. Pressmen are full of themselves, but because of religion no man would be so full of himself to consider himself as a god. But what God created in his own image and in his likeness is journalist. Before carrying on it has to be said there's a minority of pressmen who are not the kind of person we are talking about, but minorities always exist so it is normal to have somebody abnormal. In fact this minority of journalists with no ego are seen as loosers by all the others.

thepressedworld, or the game of language

Rude, selfish, egoistic, braggart, arrogant, prig, and the list could going on. Journalists have at least one of the features just listed, and in many cases the have all. Pressmen are not that kind of men is possible to trust: for their nature they have no respect for no one, except for themselves. Using these words it could be thought journalists are close to be monster, which is not totally untrue. They feel love, but just for themselves. And it's not a case if there's a huge number of divorces among the pressmen, if they spend their life in thinking exclusively to their profession missing what is really important in life. The world of the press is a box full of this kind of stories, made by men considered as gods only by themselves. «I'm a journalist», says every pressman, and in saying it he shows all his pride to be something special. Because journalists are special. That's the opinion they have for the category they belong, ignoring the have no power any more.

Nowadays media still can influence politics, society, debates and even culture, but journalists are endangered in several countries around the world (let's think about all those states where fundamental freedoms are banned) while in the so called "democracies" they have to respect the game of silence imposed by editors and "investors". Since newspapers as well as all the other media receive money by the States and by private companies, is not possible to be critic and/or write anything bad about them. It's a question of politeness, to be politically correct. ThePressedworld want to be a blog dedicated both to journalism and to journalists, a blog dedicated to the world of the press in general, or - if you prefer - the to press world. This blog, under its new formula, wants to offer a mixed of articles, personal views on the main current events as well as personal explanation on what journalism and journalists are about. The name of this blog is the result of a word game, involving the terms press, world, and their graphical and sound combination.